The Cash-Tronauts

Wasn’t it vile to see those two multi-billionaires blast their toy rockets into space? As they reached their height, it was not the height of space, it was the height of wastefulness, it was the height of condescension, it was the height of insolence, it was the height of . . .  well, you get the point. 

What could these mercenary narcissists see when they looked down on us from their recklessly extravagant perch? I doubt that it was any different from what they always see. From way up there, they saw no people. They saw no poverty. They saw no struggle.  But this is what they always see. These  people – the ones who have devoted their lives to garnering all that wealth – they can’t possibly see and sense any humane feeling for the many millions of human beings whose very survival could be saved by a fraction of a fraction of what they have kept for themselves. But that doesn’t matter to them.  They are going to spend their money on what they want to do – they want to build a rocket ship.

Maybe if they had even just paid their taxes it would help. 

Bezos and Bronson, the two “B’s.  The next flight should carry another joker that starts with a “B” – Bozo. Then, we can appropriately call these “cash-tronauts, “The Three Clowns.”

Beyond that, what did this disreputable display of selfishness actually accomplish? Nada. They put themselves into a sub-orbital flight. Was this the first time this had ever been done? You bet your yachts it wasn’t. It was done by NASA with Alan Shepard in 1961, fifty fucking years ago. What an achievement by these assholes! They had actually re-created something that was done during JFK’s first year in office.

And yet, the media went wild.  News stations dedicated hours and hours to report on every minute.  The Billionaire Beasts were the Breaking News.

So, if these two financially bloated barons of self-indulgence can get all this credit for repeating something that was done when a gallon of gas cost thirty-one cents, what other long-achieved developments will they be able to repeat with their fortunes rather than help their fellow man. These are some potential headlines in the near future:

Today, Jeff Bezos announced that after spending six billion dollars of his own money, he has built a car that allows the driver, with the push of a button, to automatically lock and unlock the doors. No longer will any rider have to reach over to the door itself. This is just a prototype, but Bezos declared that he is confident that someday all cars will be able to have these devices.

Richard Bronson issued a press release today that claims he has built a television that can show programs in full color. Branson has been working on this innovation for a decade. He says that it has cost him about ten billion dollars. “Just imagine the pictures I will be able to see,”’ Branson is quoted as saying.

So, we have two unseemly people who, when likened to the world of growing up, are the kids who grabbed their friends’ toys, thus leaving those friends with little to play with. Then they used those toys to become the most popular kids in town. Finally, the local paper wrote stories about how those two kids were the ones that the other kids should try to emulate.

C’mon people. Who and what do we now extoll? What have we become?